Crying at Movies

I was listening to the radio the other day, and the DJ’s were talking about movies that guys cry at. One of the guys said that he never cries or has cried at a movie. The other admitted too much stating that he cries all the time at movies. Then the radio show proceeded to take a number of calls from men admitting to crying in different movies. One caller stated that he cried when he watched Ladder 49.
Many men will tell you that they cried in Brian’s Song, and also in Rudy. As a man, I am willing to accept that there are certain movies in which a man may cry. This does not give a man license to cry in any movie of his choosing. That is never OK. The general rule is that a man MAY NOT cry in a movie. I repeat that for emphasis, a man MAY NOT cry in a movie. Now that we have the rule, we look to the few exceptions in which a man may cry. These would be affirmative defenses to the rule.
The movie Brian’s Song, is an acceptable movie during which a man may cry. Rudy is not. The premise of Rudy is that a short no talent average Joe walks on to the Notre Dame football team and gets to play in the last game of his senior season. Nothing sad happens, and no one dies. The emotion that it evokes is joy. There is no excuse for a man to be crying during a movie because he is overwhelmed by joy. The only reason to cry is based upon sad emotion.
The list of movies couldn’t be any bigger than 5 long. I can’t think of all the movies, but I am sure that there can’t be any more than that. Another movie that I am willing to concede is Braveheart. There, throughout the length of the movie, the audience creates a strong bond with the character of William Wallace, and at the end he is tortured and killed. That is a very emotional scene and may give grounds for a man to cry.
But just because someone dies, even a main character, in a movie doesn’t give a man a right to cry. The man who cried during Ladder 49, probably needs to go and put on his skirt. That is not on the short list of movies at which a man may cry. The movies on this short list need to evoke such a sadness over a man and do it in a manly way. The movie itself needs to be manly. The two movies that I have conceded fall into these boundaries. They are manly movies that evoke an sad emotion in a manly way. Should a man CHOOSE to cry during these movies, he would be excused. Finally, I need to state that a man never need to cry in a movie, and in nearly all cases should not cry. A man is guilty if he cries in a movie and is only excused if the movie is on the short list.

United States vs. Czech Republic

The game begins. The US is wearing blue. The keeper for the US is one of the best in the world they say. Keller, the keeper, keeps a shut out for most of his games. The refs are calling a lot against the US so far and it’s only 2 minutes into the game.
US gets a shot on goal, just a bit too high. Finally a foul on the Czechs. Another foul on the US. The ref gives yellow card on Onyewu. That was dumb. Had a smaller player done the same thing, it would have been nothing, but because he is big, he gets a card.
The Czech’s score off a header. The are dominating the game so far. The US needs to be more aggressive. Score 1-0 for the Czechs, in the 6th minute.
The Czechs are ranked second in the world behind Brazil. This should be a tough game for the US, but I still think they can do it.
Another shot on goal, with a great save by the Czechs. Donovan had a good run going with the ball, when one of the Czechs knocked him down. That was clearly a foul. And the ref recognizes it and give a yellow card.
Big shot opportunity that was off the bar. Almost for the US. There it goes again, another goal for the Czechs. This is not good for the US. The US are not looking good right now. I hope that it is just because the Czechs are that good. I hope the US can put this behind them and play better for the rest of the Cup. I guess there is still time to come back in this game, but being down 2-0 is not an easy thing to overcome.
Koller of the Czechs goes down. It looks like a hamstring. He is injured pretty bad, he may not be coming back. This may give the United States a chance to come back. But I do hope Koller is OK.
The Czechs are still dominating the game. They haven’t scored again, but the US can’t seem to control the ball, and their players are doing nothing.
The Czechs score again, and that pretty much ends this game. The US has very little chance of coming back now. In fact, next to no chance. There is not enough time. The US needs to put this game behind them and focus on their next two games against Ghana and Italy. If they win both of those games, they should be moving on. They need to play a lot better though.

England v. Paraguay

It’s 9:00 a.m. I have already showered and dressed for the day. I have a plan to watch the third game of the 2006 World Cup.. I turn on the TV and the game begins. England versus Paraguay. I am definitely favoring England in this match. I am more familiar with the English team. Only minutes into the game, David Beckham gets a free kick. It goes into the goal. Beckham has scored. No, now there are saying that it was an own goal on Paraguay. I guess one of the guys from Paraguay headed it in off Beckham’s kick. It was a great looking kick anyway.
Now the keeper for Paraguay is injured and needs to come out. I hope for Paraguay that their number 2 keeper is decent.
I’m starting to feel hungry, so I’m going to go and make some pancakes. I’ll be back.
Second half begins. The score remains 1-0 in favor of England. Paraguay is being a lot more aggressive here in the second half. I am starting to like Crouch from the English team. He’s like 6'7" and towers over everyone. He seems to have good footwork too.
There seems to be a lot of penalties in this match. That’s the 3rd yellow card that’s been given out. This lone to Crouch. He got it for arguing with the ref. That’s a stupid penalty. Now if he is a bit too aggressive on a play and gets another, he’s in trouble.
One of the English players was dribbling the ball down field when a guy from Paraguay threw him to the ground. No call on the play. That was bad officiating.
Time is running out for Paraguay. Now in the 89th minute. There is only two minutes left. A great shot on goal for England and a good looking save for Paraguay.
Were it not for the own goal, this could have been a nil-nil tie. That’s no fun at all. But I think that goal was going in one way or another. Beckham deserved that goal.
2 minutes of stoppage time. We’ll see if Paraguay can do anything in the 2 minutes. Time is running out. That’s the game. England wins the game 1-0. Congratulations to the Brits.

Are you ready for the madness?

The world is about to fall into a state of madness. Countries are going to be battling each other relentlessly, and rivalries and old hatreds will be renewed. Everywhere around the world, people will be watching their televisions wondering who will come out ahead in this battle. Everywhere but in America. The biggest sport in the world is not the biggest sport in America. It’s not even the second biggest sport. On the list of popularity in America, this sport ranks somewhere around the same place as hockey. The sport is of course, Soccer, or Football everywhere else in the world. The battle going on is, of course, the World Cup.
America doesn’t much care for Soccer, or Football. They even changed the name from Football to Soccer. I don’t have a problem with this at all. America has a popular football sport and it would be foolish to try to distinguish from American Football and Football. So Soccer is what we have in America. It is very popular among young children who play it in recreational leagues across the country. Then once the child turns a certain age, the interest is forced upon him to Football. The interest in Soccer then dies. This is unfortunate.
Soccer is a great sport. People love to play it. Not everyone likes to watch it. People offer up reasons that it is low scoring and not a lot of action. Yet people continue to watch baseball, and it is often low scoring with very little action. Soccer has a lot of actions, more so than many other sports.
America is, however, starting to like soccer. The MLS is doing well and many people are following it. We are finding more soccer on television. I spoke with a man from England once, and he told me that he was scared of American Soccer. Not right now, but of the future of American Soccer. When America gets behind something, we do everything we can to be the absolute best at it. America is getting better at soccer and in the future will be able to win the World Cup and will be a contender in every Cup.
I am excited for this World Cup and plan to watch as much as I can. I will be routing for my team, the U.S.A. But if the U.S. happens to fall out in the first round, I still plan to watch it through to the end.
Go America!